Ever wondered what some people looked like as children? That moneyed boyfriend of yours who isn’t such a looker, maybe? You are probably pouting and declaring, “Looks aren’t everything!”
Well, of course not! How about that girlfriend of yours whose looks resemble those of a certain police chief? Oops! She’s wife material, you say: Whatever makes you sleep at night, man.
One of my aunts usually says that in her eyes, all babies look the same. To be blunt, she won’t be caught dead cooing babies. Perhaps in a bid not to ‘over-do’ things she’ll cuddle the child briefly and hand them over to the next person.
During a recent family gathering, one of my cousins caught her dangling a set of keys over a six month-old’s face –trying to be playful. The latter was not going to let it go and teased my aunt for daring to do that in this “day and age”.
Anyway, I’m not too sure I agree with her sentiment. In fact, I totally disagree! Babies are NOT the same and as much as they all are born looking like they have just survived a spin in a tumble-dryer; let’s be careful not to make sweeping statements here.
Every parent (some more than others) thinks their child is beautiful, intelligent and smart, etc. That is a wonderful thing because under no circumstances should a child be made to feel that his/her parent is not proud of them.
At the same time most mothers want to hear that their new additions are adorable; I clearly remember taking offense when my best friend took surprise at my daughter’s otherwise large nose soon after birth. I was ready to disown people when comments like, “ngwana wa gago ga a na nko” (your daughter has a small nose) came from relatives.
But, shall we be brutally honest for a second? How many times have you been caught in the dilemma between saying absolutely nothing about how someone’s child looks and telling a white lie? Of course the former is NEVER an option if one doesn’t want to build a database of “frienemies” (friendly enemies), because you couldn’t at least muster a, “Ah, baby’s sooo cute!”
Attention comes ever so naturally with some babies and one can tell by how effortlessly they get people wrapped around their little pinkies like it ain’t sh*t, “All in a day’s work mama… I got this!” Someone would have to eventually step in and save the poor child from being cuddled, bounced up and down; smooched and harassed. With other babies, well…
Just the other day, I encountered a photo of a child of someone known to me and it took me a while before concluding that the child looked ‘interesting’. Shall we leave it at that? Not. I mean, I couldn’t help delving into all sorts of political correctness and usual over-analysis.
You’ve probably seen those kids that look like they are grown-up already; like they’ll tell you where to get off if you try and coo them? It’s worse if they have burdensome names like Amos and Albino at such tender ages. Dammit!
Honestly, sometimes one hopes for a moth turning into a butterfly type of situation for these little souls because playtime can be nightmarish when you are teased about your looks as a child. We all want to churn out ‘beautiful’ babies; which isn’t entirely up to us.
I not only refer to women because as it would occur, men secretly pray for sons who make the girls cry; are competitive and tough. Our biggest task as parents is to build character into the souls we give life to in order for them to be assertive and self-assured, with a healthy self-image.